Use hand signals. Always turn towards your partner so they can see your face, see that you are talking and maybe, just maybe you won't have to yell. My voice is quiet and I'm not a verbal communicator by choice. A lot goes on my head and I solve problems by not talking. When sailing with someone who talks more than I do, or who has trouble hearing me, it becomes more and more important that I make the effort to face them, project my voice without yelling and use hand signals that we prearrange for communication. Anchoring and docking are two high stress times when great communication makes a huge difference. On Tethys, a 38 foot boat on deck, we used hand signals and made a special effort to turn our bodies so they were sure to be seen around the mast. Pax is only 28 feet, but when on the fordeck with a giant main sail between us, it's just as important to get my body in view to the helm's person if at all possible. None of us like to get yelled at and I, for one, don't like yelling, either. Projecting my voice makes my body feel like I'm yelling and my body language then communicates something I'm not really feeling. I'm not angry, but it may look like I am. Having those honest talks with your sailing partner before leaving the dock will make you both more empathetic and understanding and go along way in your efforts to enjoy sailing together.

Last updated on November 24, 2008 by International Women Sailing Network